


A Series of Unfortunate Conversations and Events

by Soleil Mar



Category: Queer as Folk
Genre: Family, Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2007-11-23
Updated: 2007-12-01
Packaged: 2013-12-17 14:35:47
Rating: K
Chapters: 2
Words: 597
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3908016/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/1136115/Soleil-Mar
Summary: Otherwise known as the B and G Chronicles... Ebay





	1. EBAY

**Disclaimer: **I do not now nor have I ever owned the characters from Queer as Folk. They belong to their respective owners, CowLip and Show time. I however own the little bugger known as Boomer.

A/N: I seriously don't know where this came from, it started out as an attempt at a Holiday fic and now its just not. I know now that I can't force myself to write anything because it just comes out as something else. And I swear I tried really hard. My inner Gus won out.

* * *

When he was five-years-old he spent two whole weeks fallowing his Pop's and his 'Jussin' around asking if it was okay to sell his sister on Ebay. He brought up all these points on how she did nothing but whine and destroyed everything in sight. She had nothing to "_Contibute to soss-iety." _and he was pretty sure that she would be the down fall of his sanity. Plus the extra cash could be put to good use in the future, say a bike or car... preferably a Spider or 67 chevy impala.

He had expected some sympathy from his dads... what he got was a good laugh, fallowed by a lecture on why... _"Baby sister's are a pain the..."_

"_Brian!"_

"_...rear now but later things would get better."_

He remembered his exact words to that.

"_Boomer ase ight you guys are waaayy to closed to the stituation to see my side."_


	2. The Trap

**Disclaimer: I do not now nor have I ever owned the character's from Queer as Folk. I do however own Boomer. **

**Warning: Uh... slight religious references nothing major. **

**A/N:** It just occurred to me that when I wrote these there is a common theme... Anyone figured it out yet?

Feed back is my life's blood.

* * *

At Seven-years-old he was determined that his sister didn't deserved to be sold on Ebay... 

...the little demon needed to be exorcised.

After careful consideration they both decided that the living room would be the best place to do it.

"_Its dah biggest room in this teeny house._" was Boomer's excuse.

And it really was.

He refused to let Boomer paint the ceiling though. No way could they ever clean the "_Deve's Trap_" off before his mother's got home. Plus he figured his sister wouldn't move at all if he gave her something shiny to play with.

He and Boomer had sat her down in the middle of the living room, and because they weren't allowed to play with lighters they surrounded her with a bunch of un-lit candles that he'd found in his mother's room.

Boomer dribbled her with wine; they hadn't been able to get holy water. Boomer assured him that if it was good enough for Jesus it was good enough for her.

Just when his best friend started to chant in what he thought was Latin, his Daddy J and Uncle Hunter walked in on them.

The two adults had looked at them for a long while before Daddy J turned to his uncle with a frown on his face. The one where you knew he was putting something together.

"What?"

"You let them watch that show again didn't you?"

He never got to hear the answer because his mother's and Dad walked in just then.

Gus was sure his he'd never seen his mommy Mel turn so many colors before.

"_Splains a lot ..._" Boomer later told him.


End file.
